This beautiful bouquet of flowers was given to me by a friend at church on Sunday. She said she was thinking of me and appreciated that I was speaking and our friendship.
She also told me that she had actually bought a different bouquet and that it looked like it was wilting too soon so she went shopping again and this one was totally different than the last. She said she felt as if she was being led to certain flowers and she knew that the bouquet was not just from her but from Dean as well.
Indeed, the lavender rose is a complete favorite of mine. Dean had tried to find a suitable lavender rose plant for the front flower garden on several occasions for me and each one did not make it. The other flowers are ones that I am particular to or that were grown in the front yard each and every year. A very beautiful Easter gift.
I was reminded Tuesday evening that even though things are going pretty swimmingly .. mostly… that Jenn may still be a bit vulnerable. There is an awareness with some that perhaps there is more behind the curtain.
Hmmmmm … nice to have honest and straight talking friends.
I still have children issues, trying to get a studio up and running issues, sometimes feeling completely vulnerable for seemingly no reason issues, the day to day life things like housework, and shopping and car maintenance. I still get choked up or have a little hesitation at doing things that Dean and I did together. For example: I have a photo job next week. It is one that Dean and I were hired for several years now. It required lighting equipment. Dean was the equipment part of our team, I was the people/camera part of the team. I almost did not take the job. My oldest son talked me into it saying he would play equipment person. I am taking photos again. I enjoy taking the photos and editing them. I enjoy capturing life’s memories and the beauty of the world around. It is just different now.
Different is OK.
Dreams are allowed to morph and Dreams do not need to be dampened by changes around us.
Lyrics from Queensryche SILENT LUCIDITY
“Visualize your dream (Yes)
Record it in the present tense (Don’t be scared)
Put it into a permanent form
If you persist in your efforts
You can achieve a dream control
(Control)
(How’re you doing today?) (Better?)
Dream come true
Dream come true
Dream come true”
The entire song is embedded below. I have always loved this song. I was able to hear and see it performed live with Dean in Oct 2011. It was one of his very favorite bands. It is interesting that even songs that you have always loved can take on even greater or different meaning at different times in your life.
Other lyrics from the same song:
“I
Will be watching over you
I am gonna help you see it through
I
Will protect you in the night
I am smiling next to you…”
When I was handed the bouquet, as I look at it every day since, and know that … we are never really all alone in anything we do, in anything we really want, in anything we are called to accomplish.
God surrounds, Spirit Guides and Loved Ones are always near.